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TheLastEmbrace
Valerie ♥
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"Love has all the lasting permanence of a rainbow - beautiful while it's there, and just as likely to have disappeared by the time you blink."

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Way out
Ferran Glenda Jlong Joyce Norlyn Pawan Ruiwei Yuping

Date : Saturday, June 16, 2007
Time : 4:20 AM
Title :

Damn, I think Im crazy.

Cos I think I feel sad now.

You left us two years back then, and now, two years later, it still feels the same. It really hurts so much, and the most frustrating thing is that, I feel so sad that I cant even get the tears out. Guess I've been crying too much for all the wrong reasons that I cant do it now. And it really really feels uncomfortable when you want to cry when you cant.

I promised you that I'll take care of them, but I think I didnt keep my word, and Im not doing a good job of that. I really dont know how to, and it seems that they really need you by their side. Or in actual fact, we all need you to come back to us. I know it's impossible, no matter how much I hope you're back here, you'll never be able to. Im really sorry, cos I guess Im not that strong afterall.

I know sis cares, but she always pretends that she doesnt. She constantly gives them cold shoulders, and I cant do anything to it. Mummy always get hurt by what daddy says to her, and I cant do anything to help her with it. Daddy misses you, and I cant to anything about it also. It's just so different without you.

You may not know, but I really miss you a lot, cos no one bickers with me, no one dotes on me like how you do, no one drives me to places where I want to go, no one brings me out for dinner and movies, no one protects like how you always do as a brother. And the worst thing is, we dont even have a photo of you and us together, not even a single one. The family is incomplete, the house is too quiet without your presence.

Is there a way that I can see you or even hear your voice ? I know there's no way all this will happen, but I just want to continue dreaming of all that.

You know sometimes I feel so hurt that I really want to hate you, but I know I cant. You know we havent had peaceful reunion dinners anymore becos of you ? You know we havent been living very well without you ? You know no one makes decision for us anymore that we feel so lost every new year ? You dont know about all this that we're experiencing right now, but you must know that we all love you, really.


There's so much that I want to say that I dont where to start and where to end. Thank you for always taking care of us. Please dont forget us, please dont.

Im sorry people, just let me be emo for this post.